‘They are not forgotten’: Volunteer spends holidays with long-stay IMH patients for 15 years

SINGAPORE – For the past 15 years, Mr Yong Kwon Seng, 39, has shown up almost every Saturday and public holiday at the Institute of Mental Health (IMH) to befriend long-stay patients.

He has missed only two sessions – in 2022, when he was too bereft to turn up after his mother died of a stroke. 

While most Singaporeans gather for family meals on weekends and during festive periods, the educator spends his time with people who often have no one waiting for them.

At IMH, Mr Yong leads a volunteer group called The Achievers, which now has more than 400 volunteers.

Their focus is on long-stay patients who have been there for at least one year due to various reasons, such as having no next of kin or family support.

There are about 700 such patients now, said Dr Marcus Tan, senior consultant and chief of the Department of Recovery Care. 

Mr Yong said there are patients he saw when he first started volunteering at IMH in 2010 who are still staying in the hospital today.

For Chinese New Year, The Achievers has lined up a full slate of activities: a festive performance and games on Feb 14, visits with goodies and red packets on the first two days of the new year, and reunion lunches in February.

Mr Yong said: “The feelings of loneliness creep up a bit more during public holidays, since everyone gets together with their family.

“We want to tell them they are not forgotten, and give them a little cheer.”

The group also celebrates other public holidays and festivals, such as Christmas, Hari Raya and Deepavali, with the patients.

These celebrations are extended to patients at nearby homes, such as Sunlove Home and St Andrew’s Nursing Home, so that more people get to share in the cheer.

Mr Yong’s dedication stems from his experience growing up with an older brother who is blind and has severe intellectual disabilities.

“My brother used to scream a lot, and neighbours would call the police. Some also took pictures of our family and said nasty things, like ‘this family has a crazy person’,” he said.

Mr Yong admitted that he was initially embarrassed by and ashamed of his brother’s condition.

But his mother’s unconditional love for his brother transformed those feelings into a desire to be an advocate for the marginalised and those unable to speak up for themselves.

“My mum is really very amazing, and she told me if I have the opportunity to help others – do it,” he said, describing his family as poor in his childhood years.

“My mum worked at night, washing dishes and doing other part-time jobs when my brother was asleep, and she single-handedly took care of the whole family, in terms of care and money.”

A domestic helper takes care of his 45-year-old brother now, said Mr Yong, who is single and the youngest of three children.

He started volunteering at IMH, drawn to what he saw as one of Singapore’s most stigmatised communities.

Over time, he took over leadership of the volunteer group and expanded its activities. 

Today, volunteers organise festive celebrations, outings and initiatives such as “Boss for the Day”, where patients sell goodie bags, with volunteers assisting – an effort to boost their dignity and confidence.

A few years ago, Mr Yong used his SkillsFuture credits to learn how to cut men’s hair and he doubles as a barber for his “special friends”, the term he uses for the patients.

“They also want to look good and feel good. Grooming is important.”

No one dies alone

In 2019, he initiated the No One Dies Alone programme at IMH.

The programme pairs volunteers with critically ill patients who have no family, befriending and accompanying them in the final stretch of their lives. 

When death draws near, volunteers take turns keeping vigil so that no one leaves the world alone.

Mr Yong said: “I feel they shouldn’t have to go through the lonely process (of dying) alone, without anyone around them.”

He has accompanied 17 patients since the programme began – spending anywhere from a week to more than two years befriending them before they died. 

Whenever he gets a call to say the end is near for patients, he often rushes down to be by their side, even at midnight or 6am. 

“The vigils are usually very calm and peaceful. We hold their hands and play some music,” he said. 

Mr Yong remembers an auntie in her 60s whom he got to know in the six months before she died. 

One of her wishes was to listen to Chinese opera, which he initially played on his phone for her.

He then reached out to opera performers. And to his surprise, two artistes, fully in costume, came to her bedside to perform – free of charge.

That made her day. 

In her final hours, he sat by her bed from midnight to 6am, before leaving for work. She died a few hours later. 

He said: “I cried, as it felt like I’d lost someone I knew. And I was the only person at the cremation, besides the Cheng Hong staff and the undertaker.”

Cheng Hong Welfare Services Society, a charity, organises last rites for such patients for free, and Mr Yong assists with the preparations.

He also attends patients’ cremations and sea burials, where ashes are scattered at sea. 

“We promise all our patients (in the programme) that we will journey with them until the end. It’s not like we are superheroes, but we just want to spend time with them,” he added.

Mr Yong spends time almost every day organising the activities of the group.

Besides time, he also spends at least $10,000 a year of his own money to fund some activities, such as CNY celebrations.

Mr Kelvin Yeo, a senior manager of the volunteer programme at IMH, said Mr Yong’s passion has inspired others to volunteer, and that he continues to think of new and creative ways to engage patients.

“Kwon Seng’s generosity and compassion has touched the lives of every patient he has interacted with,” he added.

Mr Yong said: “It’s really the friendships and bonds with our special friends and the staff that keep me going. I never once considered dropping this volunteer work.

“It’s not what you have – like the 5Cs – that is important. It’s how you can contribute to others, and in the process, bring joy to yourself too.”