‘It takes a village to raise a child’: A community grows from play group for children with disabilities

SINGAPORE – PlayBuddy, a volunteer-run community group that gathers weekly for sports and play, welcomed its first participants in 2016 when Dr Teoh Chin Sim approached Cayden Ng at East Coast Park, where he was with his father.

“I just went up to him, and I asked, ‘Do you want to play sports?’” said Dr Teoh, a sports medicine specialist.

Cayden, who has cerebral palsy, global development delay and seizures, was eight years old then.

Cayden’s mother, Ms Charmaine Ho, was apprehensive about it at first.

“Could the offer be this good?” the 53-year-old homemaker recalled thinking at the time, puzzled as to how sports sessions for children with disabilities could come at no cost.

Ten years on, PlayBuddy has grown. Every weekend, the free-of-charge sports programme dedicated to children with disabilities gathers 28 regular participants and up to 10 regular volunteers at The Kallang, formerly known as the Singapore Sports Hub, to engage in sports such as fencing, rugby and swimming.

Each session, which runs for 90 minutes, is typically helmed by a member of PlayBuddy’s core team and assisted by a few volunteers. Some sessions are led by external groups, like taekwondo practitioners from the Singapore Taekwondo Federation and Sengkang Secondary School’s badminton team.

Dr Teoh said the abundance of help PlayBuddy has received in various forms cannot be quantified.

Before PlayBuddy, Ms Ho said she did not know how she could help Cayden stay active besides taking him on walks. The group has helped to provide Cayden with an environment to learn various adaptive sports and play with other children with special needs, she added.

It has also achieved goals Dr Teoh and physiotherapist Tan Jia Ling, the other founder, did not think of when they started it: PlayBuddy has brought together youth with disabilities, as well as their families and other caregivers, to form a tight-knit community.

In 2024, some mothers in the group started PlayBuddy Club: Every Monday afternoon, the children and their caregivers meet in an office space in Bishan to learn some life skills, including basic financial literacy. The youth learn to recognise dollar notes and calculate change, and are given the opportunity to practise what they have learnt in real-world situations.

The idea of PlayBuddy Club first arose in a conversation 47-year-old homemaker Shirley See had with Ms Felicity Teo, 49.

Ms See remembered expressing anxiety, wondering what would happen to her then 17-year-old child, Joel Jiang, as he entered adulthood. Her son is now 20 years old and has DiGeorge syndrome, a genetic disorder that causes poor development of body systems.

Together with Ms Lim Saw Pheng, the mother of Koh Yong Xuan, who is 17 and has Prader-Willi syndrome, they organised a structured, regular and safe space their children could go to after leaving school. Prader-Willi syndrome is a genetic disorder that causes various physical, behavioural and mental difficulties.

The mothers’ main hope for the club is that it will help smooth the path for their children to lead healthy, fulfilling and dignified lives.

The community started from the individual passions of Dr Teoh, 61, and Ms Tan, 34, who were colleagues at Khoo Teck Puat Hospital.

Watching her nurse mother accepting bunches of bananas in exchange for medical services and her dentist father offering dental services for just a dollar, Dr Teoh grew up inspired to lend a helping hand to those in need.

During her stint as chief medical officer for Team Singapore at the 2012 London Paralympics, Dr Teoh witnessed the stark contrast between the lives of Paralympians who were pushing their limits and the people with disabilities she would see along the hospital corridors back in Singapore. They were often more constrained by their disabilities than they should have been.

“I thought, ‘Did anybody ever introduce them to the concept of exercising or being active?’ Because it unlocks the potential not just for health, but for socialisation and community,” said Dr Teoh.

As for Ms Tan, she had just returned to Singapore after graduating as a physiotherapist in Australia. Working with children with spina bifida as a volunteer there made her realise the great potential those children have, sparking her desire to contribute to Singapore’s scene.

“Many times they are defined by what they are unable to do, but often we do not realise what amazing things they can do,” Ms Tan said.

Dr Teoh said PlayBuddy provides an environment for physical activity that children with disabilities are often unable to find at school.

Especially for mainstream schools, it may be impractical for physical education (PE) classes, largely organised for neurotypical and abled students, to fully include children with disabilities, she explained.

Some may be assigned a separate activity to engage in, while others sit out of PE classes entirely, both of which could lead to feelings of being left behind.

“So, they come to PlayBuddy because they feel that they are accepted for who they are… They have friends who are just like them, so to speak. They also have ‘normal’ friends like (the volunteers) and me,” Dr Teoh added.

Since Ms Teo and her 18-year-old daughter Tan Shu Wei, who has global developmental delay, joined PlayBuddy in 2018, they have looked forward every week to taking part in the group’s activities.

She realised every Saturday has become a fun day for her daughter, “which I never thought was possible”, said Ms Teo.

For the mothers, finding friends who understand and relate to similar experiences raising children with disabilities was the cherry on top.

“Being parents of children with special needs, we are able to share our experiences with each other with no doubts, and (we know that) people will not judge,” Ms Ho said.

She also highlighted how the mothers rely on each other in times of need. Once, when Cayden had a seizure and she stayed home to look after him, some of the other mothers took over her duties at PlayBuddy Club.

“It takes a village to raise a child, (so) we help each other. That’s how we work,” she said.

Other caregivers to the PlayBuddy participants have also bonded through the group.

Ms Jonaleen Salillas, 39, said she met Ms Angelica Castillo, 34, at a PlayBuddy session in 2017 – the same year the two first arrived from the Philippines to work as domestic helpers in Singapore.

Ms Salillas looks after 15-year-old Harley, who has cerebral palsy. She believes he has become more comfortable in social situations since joining PlayBuddy.

Ms Castillo cares for 18-year-old Rachelle Lee, who also has cerebral palsy.

The two helpers assist the children by guiding their arms and legs during PlayBuddy sessions, as they lack the strength to do so themselves.

A friendship soon bloomed between them. Besides meeting at least once a month on their days off, Ms Salillas and Ms Castillo regularly stay connected via video calls.

“I think because we talk and see each other every day, (and) because we share a lot of things with each other – personal and everything – so our bond is like (that of) siblings already,” Ms Salillas said

Looking forward, Dr Teoh said the long-term goal for PlayBuddy is continued expansion.

“My dream has always been to one day have 50 to 100 children playing every Saturday,” she said.