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The pain of feeling invisible in prosperous Singapore
The habit of ignoring or shunning others in our midst causes real pain to those on the receiving end of such ostracisation.
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Psychologists theorise that social exclusion is so painful because it is experienced as a threat to safety.
ST PHOTO: DESMOND WEE
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As I head into my mid-50s, one of my fears of ageing is that I will be increasingly marginalised, and eventually rendered invisible, as I get older.
After all, when one’s career slows and then stops, one loses status and significance. As one’s health declines, one is gradually robbed of autonomy. It is not far a slide from there to a frail old age dependent on others. And then one day, I may be a patient in a nursing home, calling in vain for a nursing aide to get me a bedpan, and if she is slow, I may soil my bed; or, shudders, I might be deemed a “difficult” patient who needs to be physically restrained in bed.
