Forum: Parental involvement critical in addressing bullying in schools

As a society, Singapore is giving due attention to bullying in schools, but this is only the beginning. The Ministry of Education’s approach provides a starting point on addressing incidents of school bullying.

Given that children still need guidance, especially in bullying incidents, parental involvement – for both the victims and the bully – is critical.

One study shows that parental involvement is an important factor influencing bullying behaviour. The research further suggests that parents of bullies tend not to be actively involved in their children’s lives.

I have seen this scenario play out, when my son was bullied in Primary 5. My son was punched in the face by a school bully. As a parent of the victim, my initial thoughts were whether my son’s injuries were serious and whether I had done enough to prepare him for this situation.

My son’s form teacher handled the situation with professionalism and tried unsuccessfully to reach out to the bully’s parents, as they failed to engage. So there was no conversation with the bully’s parents and the bully continued his ways by picking on other children.

My son’s teachers went one step further: When the school discipline master wanted to punish both the bully and my son (as was the school procedure then), they objected to it, citing his exemplary school conduct.

I told my son that the problem did not rest solely with the school bully, but that his parents were equally responsible.

A valuable lesson I learnt from my son: When asked why he didn’t fight back, he said he didn’t want to hurt the school bully.

Vivien Goh Choon Lian