Forum: Create safe spaces for failure to help children build resilience
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I refer to Elisha Tushara’s Opinion article “ When adults step back, kids learn to bounce back
Singapore’s education system is well known for its clear structure, defined pathways and high expectations. While these boundaries provide stability and direction, they may also unintentionally limit opportunities for children to experience failure _ an essential ingredient in building resilience as they grow up.
In a society where success is often carefully planned and measured, failure can be viewed as something to avoid rather than embrace. Children may learn early on that mistakes carry consequences beyond the lesson itself, shaping their confidence and willingness to take risks. When falling short is stigmatised, children may become more focused on avoiding failure rather than learning from it.
Encouraging children to fall or fail does not mean lowering standards or promoting complacency. Instead, it means creating environments where failure is safe, constructive and proportionate.
Whether it is managing a poor test result, losing a competition or struggling with a responsibility, these moments teach perseverance, accountability and emotional resilience.
Language also matters. When adults frame failure as part of growth rather than a personal shortcoming, children learn to separate effort and outcome from self-worth. Praising persistence, reflection and improvement – rather than just results – sends a powerful message that resilience lies in the process and not in the achievement.
Within Singapore’s well-defined education boundaries, there is room to normalise failure through varied learning experiences. Project-based work, co-curricular activities and community involvement allow children to experiment, make mistakes and adapt in ways that examinations alone may not capture. These experiences mirror real life, where solutions are rarely straightforward and setbacks are inevitable.
As children grow up, resilience becomes increasingly vital in navigating uncertainty, relationships and future workplaces. Shielding them from failure may offer short-term comfort, but it risks leaving them ill-equipped for the complexities of adult life. Conversely, learning how to recover from disappointment builds confidence, independence and adaptability.
Andrew Ee Changshun
