Why do people spend more on Mother’s Day than Father’s Day?

SINGAPORE – For a period of around two thousand years, spanning Ancient Greece and the Age of Enlightenment, the differences between men and women in the Western world were viewed through the prism of humoral theory.

Men, it dictated, were hot and dry, while women were cold and moist. 

Modern wisdom, though not quite codified in pseudoscience, prescribes a dichotomy along similarly gendered lines. Men are bold and robust. Women, light and delicate. Or, at least, that is what marketing collateral for Mother’s and Father’s Day would have you believe.

With Mother’s Day around the corner, you may have found yourself bombarded with advertisements for floral cakes, floral ice cream and flowers themselves.

See, for instance, BreadTalk’s limited-edition Yammy Blossom cake, a “floral-inspired” creation featuring layers of “soft yam chiffon, creamy yam filling, light yam mousse and delicate floral cream details”. 

If flowers are absent, elegance is communicated in other ways.

In the case of 1-Group, premium seafood like Hokkaido scallops and seasonal spring produce is used to build delicate flavours usually preferred by women, according to Ms Audrey Ng. She is associate director at The Riverhouse in Clarke Quay and The Garage in the Singapore Botanic Gardens, concepts run by the hospitality group. 

And to wash it all down? Rose champagnes, botanical-infused gin cocktails or artisanal mocktails crafted for a “sophisticated, multi-generational appeal”. 

Over at Cantonese restaurant The Black Pearl in North Bridge Road, Mother’s Day is a “light, balanced and nourishing” affair. 

The restaurant’s signature BBQ Premium Iberico Char Siew swops out fattier cuts for pork neck, while its yam paste with yam ice cream is made in-house, so the kitchen can control the sugar levels.  

“We’ve noticed that more people are paying attention to their mothers’ health and dietary quality,” says executive chef Dee Chan, 37.

What do mums and dads want?

Contrast this with the type of messaging that recurs every June: Nothing says manly affection like beer, chocolate and lots of red meat. 

Should you choose to celebrate at Pepper Lunch, you can pick between the Cheesy Rose Yakiudon ($12.90) – targeted at mums – and the Champion Marbled Steak ($22.90) – a favourite among fathers, apparently.

“Ultimately, our focus is on creating meaningful value and emotional connection: helping mums feel cherished, like a rose, and recognising dads as the champions within every family,” says Mr Terence Wong, senior marcom manager at Hot Palette, which runs Pepper Lunch’s Singapore outlets. 

At Meadesmoore, a steakhouse in Boon Tat Street, the star of the show this Mother’s Day is a Provencal-style bouillabaisse ($138++), “gently braised” with monkfish, prawns, scallops and mussels. But come Father’s Day, it will serve up a Wagyu Steak Royale ($188++), heaped with beef, lobster, bone marrow and foie gras.

Similarly, Father’s Day creations from ice cream chain Swensen’s may feature “deeper, richer flavours” like chocolate, nuts or roasted elements, often paired with “heartier mains or more robust flavour profiles”.

“The tone is slightly more playful and hearty, compared with the more delicate and refined approach for Mother’s Day,” brand manager Agatha Tan tells The Straits Times. 

Over at Bedrock Bar & Grill, though both mothers and fathers can enjoy a lunch of steak frites ($78++ a person) with bottomless truffle parmesan fries on their special day, they will receive different drinks. For mums, it is a complimentary glass of sparkling rose; and for dads, a glass of red wine or a half pint of beer. 

If this all sounds a bit predictable, well, stereotypes exist for a reason, say restaurants. 

“In our experience, mothers often gravitate towards dishes that are more nuanced and layered in flavour, something with a bit of brightness, balance and complexity rather than sheer richness,” says chef Victor Loy. He is executive chef of Eleven Seventeen Capital Group, which runs Meadesmoore, as well as Fat Belly Steakhouse in Jalan Serene and Yara in Evans Road. 

“Fathers, on the other hand, tend to lean towards dishes that are heartier and more straightforward, with deeper, more robust flavours that feel satisfying and substantial.” 

Bedrock, for its part, says it picked something “elegant” for mums, as many women tend to enjoy bubbly and lighter styles, says Mr Kevin Khoo, general manager of Commonwealth Concepts, which runs the brand. Dads, he adds, might prefer something “more robust or relaxed”.

Gendered though they might be, these tactics have proven effective.

“Around occasions like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, gender often serves as a shorthand for shared cultural meanings – care, appreciation, responsibility – which allows brands to communicate empathy quickly,” says Dr Samer El Hajjar, senior lecturer of marketing at the National University of Singapore. 

Who, then, can blame restaurants for trying to give customers what they want?

“Brands did not necessarily create this divide,” says Dr Hannah H. Chang, Associate Professor of Marketing at the Singapore Management University. “Culturally, people have already come to believe certain things about mums and dads and the family, so these are simple ways for people to demonstrate their appreciation for their parents on such occasions. That, in turn, creates a bit of a feedback loop.” 

Pampering versus practicality

Restaurants are not the only ones with contrasting approaches to Mother’s and Father’s Day. Customers, too, respond differently. Most notably, people tend to spend more on their mothers than their fathers. 

In the US, consumers planned to spend an average of US$199 (S$250) a person on Father’s Day in 2025, according to the National Retail Federation, the American retail trade association. In contrast, the estimated average national spend on Mother’s Day was US$259 that year.  

In Singapore, Mother’s Day has proven the more extravagant occasion as well. “We’ve observed that average spend per person tends to be slightly higher on Mother’s Day, as many fathers take the opportunity to really treat their wives and order a little more generously,” says chef Loy. 

Conversely, he has observed fathers footing the bill, even on their special day. “And they are generally more hesitant to spend on themselves.” 

According to Mr Christopher Chang, director of Red House Seafood, Mother’s Day typically sees stronger spending and earlier bookings, often with larger family groups. Father’s Day, on the other hand, is a more last-minute affair. 

This is largely because taking mum out has become a non-negotiable act of appreciation, says Ms Alessandra Gulino, marketing manager of Fortuna Group.

“There is a strong societal expectation to mark the day with a high-end experience, which pushes families towards premium menus and elaborate dining choices. Father’s Day celebrations are culturally coded as more relaxed, often centring on casual activities like backyard barbecues or simple outings. This translates to lower spend, even when families choose to dine out.” 

There is a deeper reason for this disparity.

“Spending differences generally reflect social norms around emotional labour and caregiving rather than simple spending preferences,” notes Dr El Hajjar. “Mothers are often perceived as central emotional anchors in families, and gifting becomes a symbolic way of recognising ongoing, and sometimes invisible, effort.” 

Consequently, the format of offerings might differ accordingly. In the opinion of Mr Joe Stevens, 64, chief executive of grocer and restaurant chain Little Farms, Mother’s Day calls for a structured set menu, while shared dishes better suit Father’s Day. 

“We feel that for our mums, they’d prefer to be pampered, so we offer something more luxurious and a little more extravagant. For dads, whether our customers themselves or their fathers, it’s more about a hearty, satisfying meal and simply spending quality time with family,” he says.

Little Farms is rolling out a three-course set menu (priced from $58++) on May 9 and 10. 

Or some restaurants might not offer Father’s Day promotions at all. French bakery chain Paul, for one, does not run dedicated promotions in June, though the brand says it is because the celebration tends to coincide with key brand initiatives.

Meanwhile, South Korean bakery-cafe brand Paris Baguette will run a Father’s Day campaign for the first time in 2026, letting customers personalise their cakes. While Mother’s Day historically attracts stronger participation, it notes that Father’s Day is also a meaningful occasion for many customers, spurring above-average spending. 

Something for everyone

That said, restaurants tell ST that spending on such occasions is growing more robust across the board.

Little Farms reports a 15 per cent year-on-year growth rate in terms of revenue across both celebrations from 2022 to 2025, while Crystal Jade Group says that spending on Mother’s and Father’s Day has been fairly even. 

Consequently, the natural next step for some restaurants is to combine the two into one continuous celebration. “Over the years, we have seen a shift towards a unified Parents’ Day occasion, driven largely by longer lead times and operational considerations,” says Ms Bing Blokbergen-Leow, executive director of GastroSense, a brand and communications consultancy with mainly F&B and hospitality clients.

She adds that this approach requires careful execution to avoid diluting the significance of either occasion. 

Ms Noelle Tan, director of communications agency Sixth Sense PR, has encouraged clients to rethink their promotions along these lines. “It makes better operational sense too,” she says.

“A two-month runway gives the restaurant team more room to build something more substantial and impactful, rather than trying to put together two separate campaigns back to back, each lasting just a weekend or month.” 

And so Crystal Jade’s Parents’ Day promotion runs from April 27 to June 30, featuring limited-edition dishes like crispy taro puff with diced duck and foie gras ($11.80++ for three pieces) available at Crystal Jade Pavilion in VivoCity, and sauteed pork ribs with diced pear in spicy Lishan sauce ($18.80++), created for its Hong Kong Kitchen outlets. 

“We have tried many formats over the years – champagne weekend brunches, high tea sets and different set menu concepts. But what we keep coming back to, and what our diners keep coming back for, are the speciality dishes we create exclusively for this period. There is something about a limited-edition dish that says to a parent: This was made with you in mind. That is the feeling we try to create every year,” says a brand spokesperson. 

Similarly, Dian Xiao Er adopted a combined approach a few years ago in response to evolving consumer behaviour. It found that families these days prefer a single, more focused celebration to multiple dinners spread across the year. 

“We place strong emphasis on shareable dishes, encouraging a warm, communal dining experience that families can enjoy together while celebrating both parents,” says executive director Soh Kim Yau. “This approach offers greater convenience and creates a more inclusive shared dining experience for the entire family.”

Avoiding pink, blue and red flags

Such initiatives mark a shift away from gendered marketing, which could easily backfire, warn analysts.

As Dr Chang notes, Gen Zs and millennials are far more cognisant of gender stereotypes. “They have different belief systems. Though they want to appreciate their parents, they don’t necessarily want to do it in the same way that has traditionally been portrayed,” she says.

Adds Dr El Hajjar: “Once messaging slips into cliches, it signals that a brand is out of touch with contemporary realities. That is increasingly costly today because consumers are not only more diverse, but also more vocal. In that sense, gendered marketing fails not because gender is irrelevant, but because oversimplification is.”

So, moves like Parents’ Day are a more inclusive way of saying thank you to the figures of authority who do not neatly fall into the traditional categories of mothers and fathers, with their attendant expectations and preferences.  

Agencies like GastroSense are therefore careful to avoid messaging that leans too heavily on gender stereotypes, promotions that are too short-lived to make a real impact, and campaigns that feel out of place for brands.

“While factors like spending habits and gender do inform how we shape a campaign, they serve as useful context rather than the main driver of our decisions,” says Ms Blokbergen-Leow.

And besides, there are other ways to serve up a delicious feast without resorting to cliched assumptions. At Red House Seafood, for example, the menu is anchored by cross-gender crowd-pleasers like crab and, according to Mr Chang, curated around “balance, familiarity and shared enjoyment, rather than gender-specific preferences”.

Italian restaurant Medusa Osteria Romana in South Beach Avenue, meanwhile, foregrounds comforting flavours and vibrant ingredients for Mother’s Day. The only pink comes from the sirloin steak in its Tagliata di Manzo, seared a blushing medium rare.