Engage our young better in fast-changing world

The world may change, but the facts regarding premarital sex do not ("World has changed, so have attitudes towards sex" by Mr Allein Godfrey Moore; Forum Online, March 3).

We live in a highly sexualised world, where sex is now degraded as a matter of lust and emotions.

Once sex is divorced from the security, commitment, communal support and procreational capacity found in the union of marriage, the family as the basic building block of society is weakened.

I agree with the writer that it is our duty as adults, especially of parents, to protect our children "from the consequences of foolish actions in all aspects of life".

Our children deserve better than to give in to their hormones.

Self-control is practised for the sake of the larger society and for individuals. Our children have always been taught self-control in how they manage their temperament and how to relate to others.

It is a timeless virtue that will develop them to be responsible adults in work and life later on.

If we perceive that teenagers are incapable of self-control in the area of sex and we, as adults, model such behaviour, it is no wonder that our young give in to their impulses.

Learning about sex through the Internet does more harm than good. Even adults have problems discerning the reliability of online sources. It can even expose our young to online sexual predators, sexual grooming and abuse.

I agree with Mrs Shelen Ang that there is a more urgent need today for parents to teach their children self-protection through discernment skills ("Parents play key role in kids' sexuality education"; Feb 20).

As she pointed out, "the father and mother play unique and indispensable roles in their child's sexual development and in teaching about relationships with the same and opposite sex".

In the natural order of attachment, it begins with mutual knowledge, followed by trust, reliance, commitment and touch, in that order.

A dating relationship becomes more stable when communication is emphasised and sex is delayed. Finding other ways to build the relationship ensures that it is not built on sex alone.

Boy-girl relationship issues are among top contributing factors in youth suicide. Sexual activity creates emotional bonds that create unnecessary stress to our teenagers in forging healthy relationships.

As parents and concerned adults, let us create a loving and open environment where our young will not hesitate to come to us for guidance and help.

Ho Lay Ping (Ms)

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