For the unfamiliar, the Fifa Ballon d'Or is an annual award given out to either Cristiano Ronaldo or Lionel Messi, depending on which of the duo is more fashionable to like that particular year. Boring!
Now let's see some nominees for the Ice Bucket Challenge Ballon d'Or instead, as footballers have been lining up to take part in the viral craze which sees people drench themselves in freezing cold water, before nominating three others to do the same or donate $100 to amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) research and assistance.
1) Either they forgot to add the ice to the bucket or Australia's Tim Cahill, now at the New York Red Bulls, has skin of steel. He sits there with the nonchalance of a man waiting for a haircut.
2) You've got to applaud Cristiano Ronaldo for having the stones to do it in his underwear. Even when it's not about him, it's got to be about him.
3) Watching David Luiz's Sideshow Bob haircut get drenched and flattened strikes the same chords of satisfaction you get when popping bubble wrap. Superb.
4) Manchester City captain Vincent Kompany's "bucket" is so big it needs three men to carry it.
5) Here's a shout-out to footballers who have used the challenge to take jabs at people who've slighted them in the past.
John Terry passive-aggressively included in his nominations former manager Rafael Benitez, whom he never saw eye-to-eye with, while Neymar called out Juan Camilo Zuniga, whose knee fractured Neymar's spine at the World Cup and ended his tournament prematurely.
Arsenal pair Kieran Gibbs and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain have also, quite hilariously, nominated referee Andre Marriner, who got the pair mixed up in a match last season. Marriner sent Gibbs off for an offence Oxlade-Chamberlain committed against Chelsea.
6) Let's choose a winning manager for the prize as well. If you forgot that David Moyes is capable of more facial expressions than the weary grimace of a man on death row, he actually smiles in this one:
Our winner is Jose Mourinho though, just for the sheer anger of the scream that accompanies his drenching.