Just Saying

Guys, please stop saying 'bro', 'dude', and 'mate'

Men only use "bro" to add a layer of sugar over a hard nugget of compressed fertiliser

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Listen: You have to stop saying "bro". I'm your friend, and I have to tell you that you sound like an idiot when you use "bro", or "dude", and "mate".

You are not allowed to use "bro" the same way your parents cannot use "cool". It does not sound right in your mouth. I cringe for you.

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A version of this article appeared in the print edition of The Sunday Times on May 21, 2017, with the headline Guys, please stop saying 'bro', 'dude', and 'mate'. Subscribe