Forum: Neighbour disputes are better resolved than won

I welcome the nationwide expansion of the Community Relations Unit, and particularly the move to encourage earlier mediation in neighbour disputes (S’pore’s neighbour dispute unit for severe noise and hoarding to be expanded nationwide from Sept 1, Aug 28).

While stronger mechanisms are important for serious and persistent cases, Singapore should try to resolve disagreements before they escalate into disputes that become increasingly difficult to untangle.

Having been involved as a mediator, I have seen how disagreements can sometimes grow far beyond the issue that started them. Mediation gives parties an opportunity to interrupt that cycle.

For mediation to work, both parties must be prepared to come to the table. It means being prepared to listen, understand the other person’s concerns, and explore whether there is a practical way forward that both sides can accept.

Too often, when conflict arises, the first questions are: Who is right? Who is wrong? Who should apologise? Who should be held responsible?

While those questions may be important, it’s also worth asking: Can this still be resolved?

Of course, not every dispute can or should be mediated. There will always be situations where intervention, enforcement or adjudication is necessary. But Singapore should give people every reasonable opportunity to settle their differences before reaching that stage.

Delane Lim