Endless advice? When parenting becomes an optimisation exercise
Managing risk and maximising outcomes creates anxiety. We need to build a society that is realistic about what our children – and parents – need.
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As Singapore’s total fertility rate fell to a record low of 0.87 in 2025, it intensified a national conversation about parenthood.
PHOTO: ST FILE
Huang Pei and Rhea Tan
As parents, we are almost always receiving a steady stream of urgent advice that is individually reasonable but collectively difficult to reconcile: Screen time is harmful, but educational content may be beneficial. Let children struggle, but protect them from stress. Set firm boundaries, but be responsive.
None of these statements is inherently wrong. But do they help at 7pm on a weekday when your child is cranky, you are exhausted and dinner still needs to happen?
