Sitting on the fence when kids bicker

I used to think helping my daughters see reason would result in resolution and peace, but the more I heard them out, the less I knew what to do

Sometimes I'd rather be sandwich filling for a rock and a hard place than a father of two daughters who behave like they are training to be courtroom lawyers in the employ of wily criminals who will once again escape the long arm of the law.

When F and S quarrel and fight for their rights to retaliate, annoy, mock, taunt, gloat, sneer - there aren't enough verbs to describe their endlessly inventive bickering - they prefer to take their case to hapless me. It is my reward for introducing them to the concept of fairness.

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A version of this article appeared in the print edition of The Sunday Times on April 08, 2018, with the headline 'Sitting on the fence when kids bicker'. Print Edition | Subscribe