SISTERS

Funny gals Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are so tight and right for each other like Bat-chick and Robin-dette, I'm amazed no one has cast them as sisters until this sibling comedy (never mind that they don't look like each other at all).

Their characters are about to lose their childhood home after their parents sold it and they've gotta have one last wild party - complete with Fey hooking up with wrestler John Cena ("The safe word is 'keep going'," he deadpans) and a poor dude hooking up with a music box in the most unfortunate of places.

Director Jason Moore (Pitch Perfect, 2012) helms this movie as if it were American Pie: The Honey Pie Edition.

THE REVENANT

What the heck is a "revenant"? It means "a person who has returned, especially supposedly from the dead".

"I'm not afraid to die anymore. I've done it already," intones Leonardo DiCaprio solemnly. This must be about him missing out on the four acting Oscars he was nominated for.

He plays legendary American explorer and trapper Hugh Glass who, in the early 1800s, was mauled viciously by a bear and left for dead by his fellow adventurers.

He seeks something here. It's supposed to be revenge, it could be redemption, but mostly it's about seeking the most awesome angle to show how desolate, isolated, unwashed, elemental and damnation-freezing this pulsating, panting dusky clip by Birdman director Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu is.