Madam Lily Ong is making a mountain out of a molehill with her response to United States President Donald Trump's no-show at yet another Asean summit (US not the proper venue for summit with Asean, Nov 11).

The US' multifaceted engagement with South-east Asia and East Asia has spanned over a century.

It did not start with Mr Trump; neither will it end with him.

Asean should focus on nurturing healthy win-win ties with its American friends for the long term; not be distracted by idiosyncratic outliers, or short-term bruises to its collective pride and ego.

The group has already reciprocated Mr Trump's absence with a watered-down representation for its dialogue session with the Americans in Bangkok.

There is no further need to aggravate this hiccup by snubbing his invitation to Asean leaders to gather in Washington for a summit, especially since this is not the first such meeting between the group and one of its dialogue partners.

Former US president Barack Obama initiated and hosted a first special US-Asean summit in California in 2016.

Since then, other dialogue partners such as Australia and India have convened similar meetings to bolster ties with Asean.

Would these leaders bother playing host to their Asean counterparts if the grouping is irrelevant?

Are they asking their South-east Asian friends to pay tributes to them during the visit like some old imperial overlord?

There is nothing unequal or exclusive about these special summits.

Madam Ong should try not to see ghosts when there are none.

After all, false pride and thin skins are rarely the best traits for successful international diplomacy.

Toh Cheng Seong