Mediation can help with fallout from failed marriages

Responsible co-parenting is beneficial to the children ("Ex-spouses must learn to co-parent"; July 26).

Not only is the child able to understand the situation, but he is in a better position to continue the parent-child relationship and not have access to either parent cut off.

Even as we strive to ensure that the child's interests are met, we must not forget that the divorcing couple themselves require much support as they move on and get past the hurt of a broken marriage.

As a mediator, I strongly advocate a more broad-based and holistic approach to supporting families, especially troubled marriages, through an integrative approach to mediation and counselling.

Mediation complements the counselling process by helping the couple work out details of the split while recognising the emotional aspects of the people involved.

Counselling, with marriage closure therapy, helps both parties to accept responsibility for their part in the deterioration of their relationship, helping couples become more forward-looking in their roles as co-parents and take responsibility to nurture the children in the best possible way.

Should couples choose to end their marriages, I hope they choose to end them well, for the children's sake as well as for themselves.

A version of this article appeared in the print edition of The Sunday Times on August 16, 2015, with the headline 'Mediation can help with fallout from failed marriages'. Print Edition | Subscribe