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To divorce, or not: He cheated twice, so she ended marriage

This story was first published in The Straits Times on Oct 13, 2013

May's husband cheated on her for the second time when she was pregnant with their only child, and she decided enough was enough.

May (not her real name), 35, said: "I thought he would change after his first affair, but when I found out about the second one, I realised he wouldn't change."

In their 10-year marriage which ended earlier this year, her husband, who is in his 30s, hopped from job to job in the sales line and spent freely.

May, a former accountant, paid for the flat, the car, covered the household bills and even his credit card debts as she earned more.

About four years ago, she discovered there was some hanky-panky going on with his colleague. When she confronted him, he asked for a divorce.

She was devastated. But he then changed his mind and promised to end the affair. May forgave him, but learnt later that he was still seeing the other woman. "I still had feelings for him but I really couldn't accept that he kept cheating on me, so I wanted to divorce him," she said.

This time, he ended the affair. May went on to have a baby.

But about two months after giving birth to their daughter, now three, she discovered he was cheating with another married colleague.

May had quit her job to care for the baby, but her husband hardly provided for the family. She was constantly stressed about paying the bills and had to dig into her savings.

The breaking point came the day he blamed her for not working. "I felt so drained and jaded. I wanted to put a stop to all this nonsense."

 This story was first published in The Straits Times on Oct 13, 2013

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