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Tough to let go of daughter

I read Thng Lay Teen's column My Daughter's Getting Married (SundayLife!, June 14) with teary eyes.

My only child is in her teens now, but still hugs me tightly when she sees me.

When she was in Secondary 2, she went on a school immersion trip to China. While she was there, I went to work as usual, but my heart was elsewhere. I checked my mobile phone regularly for fear I would miss an SMS or WhatsApp message from her. I waited patiently for her to return to her hotel and update me on her day. Seeing and chatting with her online was joy beyond words.

Recently, she mentioned that she would like to stay in a hostel when she goes to university in a couple of years. At first, I told her that she would be well-pampered and continue to enjoy her mum's top-notch service if she remained at home. When that didn't work, I exaggerated the disadvantages of staying in a hostel in order to keep her with me. But she is now a young woman with a mind of her own.

Soon, she will pack some of her belongings to move to a hostel room. I do not wish to think about giving her hand away yet. I know the day will come before I realise it. But wasn't it a short while ago when my dad handed me to my husband at my wedding?

Lim Lih Mei


I read Thng Lay Teen's column as I am around her daughter's age and also married.

This paragraph baffled me.

"I had held out the hope she would buy a flat nearby and it turned out not to be - she bought a resale flat close to her in-laws, which was what the family wished. After all, she was marrying the eldest son."

We are now living in a modern world in 2015. What is this nonsense about the eldest son being obligated to live near his parents? If her beau has siblings, isn't it more important for her to spend time with her mother, given that she is the only child?

Joanna He

A version of this article appeared in the print edition of The Straits Times on June 20, 2015, with the headline 'Tough to let go of daughter'. Print Edition | Subscribe